Furthermore…

As angels enjoy afternoon tea, one comments:

“You certainly are a Heavenly Host!”

I seem to remember that St. Thomas Aquinas taught that all things desired are seen as good, even if intrinsically evil.  The intellect may be clouded, and the appetite may go out to the acquiring a perceived good, such as the pleasure and prestige of owning a famous work of art, meanwhile excusing or glossing over the evil of stealing it.

 It might be seen as desirable to tolerate the wrongs of another, so as to ‘get along’ and avoid conflict. The person tolerated might at first feel that a victory has been won, but doesn’t toleration imply a smouldering distaste that is likely to later flare up into open hostility?

It seems a bit more generous to ‘understand’ someone’s wrongs, perhaps along the line of “in the same circumstances I might do the same thing” or “I can see where you are coming from.” Here, the perceived good might be a sort of self-satisfied pride in one’s openmindedness. Still, there is a residue of disagreement, and even though one understands, one does not agree. It might be best in the long run to let this be communicated, rather than allowing it to seem all is well.

For a true meeting of the minds, it is necessary to arrive at actual agreement,  a much more difficult and challenging task than tolerating, or even understanding.