Furthermore…

Priest to waitress: ” Two fried eggs, but be sure they’re not unequally yolked!”

A fertile image came to me this morning in which we are all dancers and performers in God’s giant musical production, ala Broadway, except we are all out of step, missing our cues. bumping into one another, hitting false notes, and messing up in every possible way. Still, God has His plan, and knows exactly where we all should be, and what we should be doing, and he watches lovingly, full of patience, waiting for someone to wise up and get it right (become a saint). But even when a  saint starts doing it right, the rest of the troupe is still a sorry mess. But God knows what should, and ultimately will, be going on  — when His will is done.

Couple talking to priest outside  church. “No, I wouldn’t say we’re Credo Catholics. She likes the Gloria, and I like the Sanctus!”

There was a good special about Mother Teresa on EWTN. It was a panel discussion with four women who knew her well.

 She was very strong minded. She knew what she wanted to happen, and nobody could sway her with ’sensible’ talk. Her heart doctor said she was the most difficult patient she ever had.

 I never had the privilege of seeing her in person, but I did get to be in the same room with Dorothy Day one time when she spoke at Calvert House, the Catholic Center at the U of

 Chicago.

Mary:

“You didn’t happen to have a visit from an angel, did you,  Elizabeth?”

I  have a weight problem. Eat too much.  Appetite 10, Will Power 0– the home team is always getting trounced.  Once I brought my failures to eat prudently to the confessional, and Father suggested  that I consume lots of water and try to slay, er,  drown the dragon, that way.

 I am working on developing an appetite control technique that involves the imagination, and a certain kind of breathing.

First, decide which food(s) or fattening beverage(s) are your most impossible-to-resist temptations. It might help to identify the time of day when you are most likely to overindulge too. That way, you can be prepared for the challenge.

At a time when you are not thinking of, or craving,  food or drink, learn this little breathing trick: slightly pursing the lips, gently breathe in and out little puffs of air, savoring God’s good gift of pure atmosphere, free, wonderful and life-giving. This is a highly enjoyable discipline. If you are not enjoying it, something is distracting you from its satisfying sense of controlled participation in a most basic feeling of apppreciation of the wonder of being alive. Maybe this isn’t going to work for you, but don’t give up without trying a few more times; it’s worth it!

Next, once you’ve learned how to enjoy the pleasures of little puffs or air, conjure up (imagine) that irresistable tempting item of nutrition, maybe a juicy cheeseburger and chocolate milkshake sitting there before you. You’re still on safe ground — it’s only a mental cloud.

Now the trick: think of yourself entering into and extracting from that imaginary temptation its savory, delectable essence with all its accompanying satisfaction, which you then take into yourself in the form of little puffs of airy food essence.  Repeat consciously and sensuously.

 Wonderful!  Victory!! You’ve obtained  surrogate satisfaction.  And not a calorie has crossed your lips. With luck this regimen will replace the unwanted satisfactions  (which don’t really satisfy and cause distress) of real  (over)consumption.